Random update.

I am not sure where to place certain things in my life.
Where to draw the line, where to give up.
What I should wait for, what I should count as loss.
Who I should let in, who I should invite in, who I should show to the door.
I call on Christ and all his might--with all my might.
I close my eyes, holding back these baby girl tears. It's because I am strong, I am tested.
While most kids are facing tests on paper and papers being teased, I am kissing reality and denying it's curse.
I have come to realize that if I want to be taken care of, I am the best person for the job. With Christ in my heart, and my will power behind me, I will survive and be vivid with it.
On my way home from work tonight, as I was driving down Gilbert Road, crossing Main, the idea of faith struck me so real. The Word talks about faith like a mustard seed can grow into something huge. Well, I'd say my faith is quite a bit larger than a mustard seed, but that doesn't mean that it can't still grow. And that's where I'm at. God is stretching my faith. What will I believe for? My family is in dire need of a miracle. Now how do I step out of the boat and believe for that, knowing good and well that the water beneath my may in fact gulp me into the pit of it's stomach? I keep my eyes on Christ and don't look back. Don't look back.
I can't bring myself to listen to secular music anymore. I can't say that it's a permanent change, but where I'm at right now calls for beautiful things that feed my inner soul. I find so satisfaction in flesh talk and desires. Gag me, please.
So I find myself tuning out to KLOVE in my car, resting to Grand Prize in my room, and writing for hours to God about anything/anyone and everything/everyone.
I trust that everything will be okay. That's not to say that everything is going to pancake itself-become simple and sweet, but it will be okay. Because I am me, and I can handle this. This varies. But I've got it (: